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17 Things We Loved About Stranger Things 3 (And 6 We Didn’t)

io9 ReviewsReviews and critical analyses of fan-favorite movies, TV shows, comics, books, and more.  

The third season of Stranger Things is here and, if you’re like us, you spent most of July 4th weekend glued to your TV, desperate to know what’s next for Eleven and the crew from Hawkins, Indiana, circa 1985.

Overall, there was a lot to like in the Duffer Brothers’ third foray into this series and, below, we’ll discuss all of it in spoiler-filled detail, as well as a few things we didn’t love about this season.

We loved…

I’m sorry, what just happened?

The cliffhanger

What an ending. The Byers are moving? Eleven is going with them? She’s lost her powers? Hopper is alive and in a Russian prison? The freaking Demogorgon is back? The final few minutes of Stranger Things 3 packed enough surprises in for a whole other season. And, well, they’re gonna have one to try and explain how that all plays out. But after an already satisfying ending with the crew saving the world once again, it was awesome to see how the consequences of this season may loom larger moving ahead. We haven’t seen the last of the Upside Down. Plus, the promise of action outside of Hawkins may bring Stranger Things to a whole other level of epic. We can’t wait to see how it plays out.

The growing up

When you make a show starring young kids, obviously, they are going to grow up as the show goes along. In the case of Stranger Things 3, this was handled beautifully, giving us stories that felt perfectly age-appropriate for the characters and also completely different from everything we’ve seen in the past. They’re all, in some way, impacted by young love. The show dove deeper into the romances of Mike (Finn Wolfhard) and El (Millie Bobby Brown), Lucas (Caleb McLaughlin) and Max (Sadie Sink), and Dustin and Suzie (kind of), and provided new perspectives on the subject from other characters. Steve (Joe Keery) finds out the girl he is attracted to is gay. Will (Noah Schnapp) realizes he hasn’t matured as quickly as his friends and he himself might be gay (more on that in a bit). All the other relationships have plenty of ups and downs too, whether it was Mike and El sneaking behind Hopper’s back, Max and El pushing the boys aside, the girl talk, the boy talk, spying, all of the romance added another layer of strong relatability to the characters.

Billy gets a hell of a season this year even if, well, you know. He dies.

Evil Billy

Billy Hargrove didn’t have the best debut in season two—mainly because he wasn’t given anything to do, other than bully his younger sister and eventually get chewed out for it. It was clear that actor Dacre Montgomery was capable of so much more though and we got it with Billy’s turn in season three. Early on, Billy was possessed by the Mind Flayer and became its main host, sent to recruit more victims to fulfill its dark purpose. Montgomery nailed Evil Billy’s raw sinisterness, but also managed to give the character vulnerability, depth, and beauty underneath the tragedy. It was one of the rare times a villain’s noble sacrifice felt like it was actually warranted because Montgomery gave us a reason to see who Billy was under all the layers of trauma and possession. It’s a shame he had to lose his life in the end but ultimately, the sacrifice was the perfect ending to an excellent arc.

The scope of it all

Each season of Stranger Things has gotten bigger and season three takes things to a whole new level. Not just the massive Battle of Starcourt Mall, but the battle at the sauna, the fights with Hopper (David Harbour) and the Russian Grigori (Andrey Ivchenko), the fact there’s a freaking Russian base that’s accessible only by a potentially deadly elevator ride into the center of the Earth. Oh, and that skyscraper-sized bad guy too. Everything about Stranger Thing 3 felt like it had finally gotten the budget and scope the Duffer Brothers had so desperately wanted to emulate since season one, and the change was not wasted.

Dustin rose the ranks on Stranger Things this year.

Dustin’s emergence

Dustin (Gaten Matarazzo) has always been probably the most interesting member of the group, what with his hilarious demeanor and crazy confidence. But season three took that to a whole new level. He came back from camp a changed man. He had a girlfriend. He seemed wiser than his buddy Steve and he felt like a true leader in a dire situation where he was fighting his very own version of the Cold War, at the height of the real one.

The construction of the plot

El and Max are looking for the missing lifeguard. Steve, Dustin, and Robin are figuring out the Russian code. Nancy (Natalia Dyer) and Jonathan (Charlie Heaton) are looking into pest problems. Hopper and Joyce (Winona Ryder) are curious about magnets. Everyone this season is solving their own mystery and, in each case, the characters think their journey is the most important thing happening. However, the viewers know not only is that not the case, but that all these storylines are connected.

That simple structural choice works wonders for the show. Giving the characters clear, distinct goals makes every story feel different. That, in turn, brings the show to life and helps the actors dive deeper into their characters. Plus, it allows the show to tell a more complex, richer, more epic story resulting in some huge moments later on. And most of those moments come when the characters finally meet up and figure out what’s going on.

“You can’t spell ‘America’ without ‘Erica’” is the quote of Stranger Things 3.

The rise of Erica and Max

Stranger Things started off as a show about four boys, plus El. Ahead of season two, we were excited to hear that another girl—Max, the tomboy skateboarder—would be joining the crew, only to be left wondering what the point was when the show didn’t give her enough to do. Season three finally did right by Max; she’s still very much a supporting character, but beyond being “Billy’s sister” or “Caleb’s girlfriend,” she formed a close friendship with El, giving her relationship advice and introducing her to the wonders of carefree stuff like shopping and Ralph Macchio. As for Erica (Priah Ferguson), Caleb’s sassy little sister was a breakout character in season two, so her increased presence this time around felt natural. You just knew, when she kept turning up at Scoops Ahoy, that she’d be drawn into the bigger story, and sending her through the air ducts, John McClane-style, was perfect—as was her slow realization that nerd culture, which definitely includes My Little Pony, is actually way cooler than she ever realized.

Erica realizing her truth

Yup, we offering up a double scoop of Erica. Going into the third season, one of the biggest questions concerning Erica focused on how the series would handle her, especially given Stranger Things’ so-so history of introducing other female characters like Max. Though the show could have easily relied on the already established formula of letting Erica drag the older kids with wisdom beyond her years, it went further by giving her a small character arc of her own that has a significance that’s larger than Stranger Things.

As Erica becomes increasingly involved in the gang’s investigation of the latest round of paranormal happenings in Hawkins, she repeatedly butts heads with Dustin, who she accurately identifies as the most prototypically nerdy member of the group. Erica, who is objectively cool as hell, sees herself as being fundamentally different than Dustin, her brother Lucas, or their friends because she’s never really been one to get wrapped up in fantasy roleplaying or Ghostbusters.

But what Erica gradually realizes, in part because of her interactions with Dustin, is that she really, really isn’t all that different than them when you really think about it. Dustin points out that not only is Erica particularly good at math and very down to go on dangerous adventures, she’s also an avid My Little Pony stan who knows the franchise’s fantastical lore in and out. Much as Erica may loathe to admit it, she’s a nerd of the highest order who fits right into Stranger Things’ larger cadre of Soviet-fighting children. But the great thing about Erica’s arc and her realization is that it explicitly recognizes the role she plays within Stranger Things’ narrative, a space that little black girls like Erica have been largely missing from in genre pop culture for far too long.

Eleven’s wardrobe is everything this season.

1980s fashion

This season of Stranger Things dialed the cheesy ‘80s fashion up to 11, and we were here for it. The scrunchies, the short-shorts, the fanny packs, the neon makeup that magically stayed on Mike’s mom’s (Cara Buono) face after she went for a swim. The series was visually trying to show us that times were a-changing in Hawkins, that the small town of previous years was making way for something bigger and flashier. But it wasn’t just about the symbolism, it was also about celebrating some truly glorious style. El wasn’t the only one who was having a ball with the hip, happening threads. “Put on your jelly bracelets and your cool graffiti coat. Let’s go to the mall today.”

El’s empowerment

This might seem like an odd one, given that El actually loses her superpowers at the end of season three, but prior to that, she discovers an inner strength that she’d previously been lacking. Season two saw her assert her independence and do some soul-searching, but as season three starts off, she’s putting all her energy into her relationship with Mike. After she dumps him, she’s able to explore her own personality (and personal style!) for the first time. She’s no longer afraid of her powers; her powers are what make her unique and she uses them all the time. And while El will presumably get her powers back next season, she’s still got some catching up to do when it comes to being a regular old human being…with fewer nosebleeds, too.

Robin freaking rules.

Robin

That’s it. That’s the entry. Everything about her. Fine, you want an example? How about…

Things Got a Little Queer

Like in so many of the classic films this season of Stranger Things pays homage to, love works its way into a number of the characters’ arcs, and after spending seven episodes endangering his life alongside newcomer Robin (Maya Hawke), Steve clumsily professes his romantic feelings for his new friend, which she quickly rebuffs. As much as Robin enjoys spending time with Steve, she immediately reiterates an anecdote from high school she previously told him, only more specifically this time, revealing she’s a lesbian and not romantically interested in him. Rather than getting bent out of shape about it, Steve rolls with it.

Robin’s purpose in Stranger Things isn’t really to exist as the object of Steve’s desire. To be clear, that is technically what she ends up being for most of the season even though she turns him down, and this is an instance where a queer character’s identity could have been fleshed out a little bit more outside of the context of her not being interested in some guy. But to be fair, this is a kind of coming out experience that a lot of people on both sides of the equation can relate to, and the way it plays out in Stranger Things is infinitely more progressive than how an ‘80s genre classic likely would have handled it.

It’s never addressed in the season again, but there’s also a brief moment when Will and Mike have a confrontation about the growing fractures in their friendship and Mike suggests that Will doesn’t understand why everyone wants to hang out with their girlfriends because Will doesn’t like girls. In the original pitch for Stranger Things, Will was initially described as identifying as gay which might mean that the significance of that exchange could be explored in future seasons.

The production design of Starcourt is so great.

Starcourt Mall

Malls are so totally 1980s, so setting Stranger Things’ latest nostalgic adventure in a great big shiny shopping center—complete with the expected exact recreations of staple businesses like the Gap, Zales, Orange Julius, and Hot Dog on a Stick—was a clever move, as was working in other media (like the iconic Back to the Future scene set in a mall parking lot) that fit the theme. But the show didn’t just use Starcourt Mall as set dressing, it was part of season three’s massive conspiracy, distracting Hawkins with the joys of consumerism while hiding that secret Russian lab many, many stories underground. And the mall’s impact is shown to be even greater than the more obviously terrifying monsters running around, with empty storefronts filling downtown and protestors begging the city government to support small businesses over giant chains. The Mind Flayer might not be real, but anyone who’s lived in a small town that’s been completely reshaped by a mall or a Wal-Mart can certainly relate to that particular horror.

Pop culture done right

As Stranger Things’ larger story has grown more intricate and complex over the course of its three seasons, the series’ initial conceit of paying tribute to classic genre films has gradually shifted in an interesting way. This season features a number of nods to films like The Shining, The Terminator, Alien, and George Romero’s zombie films, but they’re all incorporated into the fabric of Stranger Things’ world in much more subtle ways because the show’s gotten to a point not where its mythos can really stand on its own two legs. The nods to the classics don’t exactly jump out at you when they pop up this season because they aren’t meant to be the point of the show. Rather, they’re reminders that the Duffer Brothers are well aware of what came before them, and they’re comfortable making a go of putting Stranger Things into the larger pop cultural canon.

Mind Flayer, you so nasty.

The gore and creature design

When Stranger Things 2 ended with that shadowy, spidery figure looming over Hawkins, it was a lot to live up to. Stranger Things 3 delivered on that and then some, revealing the Mind Flayer in many, many forms, each of them terrifying and gross. It started small, absorbing exploded, gooey rats, and then graduated to devouring its many, many, mind-controlled humans. Along the way, it T-1000’d itself through grates like the Blob, all of which lead to the big reveal of the Flayer at its full size, trampling through the Starcourt Mall. Complete with tentacles, fangs, slime, you name it, the creature was like everything we know from ‘80s horror movies, and the first two Stranger Things seasons, all rolled into one.

The Byers’ exit

The season ended with Joyce Byers moving her family, which now includes El, out of Hawkins. Seemingly for good. The final scene of them packing up and driving out was heartbreaking, with the four boys and their circle of friends being forced to part ways…some of them for the first time in their lives. As someone who moved a lot when they were younger, this really resonated with me. I was always the one leaving town, not the one staying behind, but seeing this made me realize how tragic that experience is for people on all sides.

Plus, we got that one redeeming moment from Hopper (more on him in a bit), when El got a chance to read the speech he never ended up giving her and Mike. It was an appropriately poignant message on the nature of growth and change, which is really what the season was all about. I’m sure something will happen to bring these characters back together in season four, but until then we’re left on division and uncertainty. It’s going to be a rough road for all of them, and for us too.

“The NeverEnding Story”

Events were building to an intense climax in the final episode of Stranger Things 3. The kids square off with the Mind Flayer in the mall while Joyce, Hopper, and Bauman (Brett Gelman) infiltrate the Russians’ underground lab to desperately try and close the doorway to the Upside Down. To do that, they must crack a safe that will only open using a specific math equation…but in these pre-Google times, nobody can remember the correct sequence of numbers. The world’s only hope is Dustin’s ham radio set-up and his long-distance girlfriend from science camp, Suzie—and even though everyone had pretty much decided Suzie was made up at that point in the story, the mystery girl steps up all the way from Salt Lake City with the info they need.

But there’s a catch! Before she’ll spill the digits, she makes “Dusty-bun” duet with her on English pop star Limahl’s gloriously corny theme to 1984 fantasy epic The NeverEnding Story, which also happens to be about a kid saving the world. In the context of the story, it initially feels like a NeverEnding musical moment, as all the other characters (and the audience) can’t quite believe what they’re witnessing. But despite the delay in the action, the musical sequence is so adorable—and the young actors so surprisingly good at singing (Gaten Matarazzo and Gabriella Pizzolo were both on Broadway); same goes for later in the episode, when Max and Lucas offer a mocking reprise of the song—that it ends up adding a jolt of fun into the moment, not to mention fitting perfectly into Stranger Things’ nerds-win message.


We didn’t love…

We love you Jim, but you did not shine this season.

Sheriff Hopper

We love Dad Bod Sheriff as much as the next person, but he was insufferable this season. Jim Hopper spent most of his time acting violent, ill-tempered, drunk, and emotionally and verbally abusive. His treatment of El and Joyce was toxic and did not get the dressing down needed by either person. In fact, the opposite happened. Joyce ended up stuck with the emotional labor of placating this unstable person, rewarding him with a date when he did not deserve one. It’s clear they were going overboard with the overprotective father trope—especially in how he treated Mike, which was seriously fucked up—but if you fail to properly unpack or break down the stereotype, it instead just becomes who he is.

The pacing

Like season two, Stranger Things 3 takes a while to get going. Basically, the first three episodes felt like meticulous table setters. It’s not until episode four, “The Sauna Test,” when things actually kick into gear. Then, even after things ramp up a bit, almost every single major reveal comes in the final episode. Some of the characters don’t even see each other until then. And while that separation helps the show in some aspects, it also holds it back in others, like narrative balance. Plus, even in the superior later episodes, stuff like Hopper and Joyce trying to translate what Alexei (Alec Utgoff) is saying feels so long and drawn out. The good parts greatly outweigh the bad but we just wish the Duffers could figure out how to pace this stuff more evenly.

You deserved better, Cary Elwes.

The Mayor

Cary Elwes, star of The Princess Bride, played Hawkins’ deeply sleazy mayor, a neat bit of casting that unfortunately didn’t really offer much payoff. Elwes was fine, but the role felt more like a glorified cameo than anything. Last season’s Dr. Sam Owens (Paul Reiser’s character) was similarly light on screen time, but he was so important to the plot it made a lot more impact. We wouldn’t expect to see Elwes’ Mayor Klein unexpectedly pop up next season either, like Reiser’s Dr. Owens did. Why would he?

The Russians

Every season of television needs a villain in one form or another, and while the returned Mind Flayer would have been perfectly terrifying on its own, Stranger Things spread out its story by tying its presence to a secret Soviet testing facility hidden beneath the mall. The problem with Stranger Things’ Russian threat this season is that we’re never really told what it is that they’re trying to do, which is a problem that you can perhaps attribute to the fact that the show is aping stereotypical depictions of villainous Soviets who have to be stopped by American action heroes. While that kind of bad guy archetype might work for a cinematic story that only runs for two hours, Stranger Things’ episodes clock in at a whopping eight, which is to say that the series had more than enough time to give its shadowy Soviets a bit more substance. Yes, they’ll be back, but it all felt a little disconnected this time around.

So, so weird and creepy.

Mrs. Wheeler and Billy

While her poolside fashion sense cannot be denied, the whole “Mrs. Wheeler has a crush on Billy” subplot, which was teased last season, was slathered on so thick it quickly became uncomfortable. Of course Mike and Nancy’s mom isn’t going to sneak out to a Motel 6 to cheat on her husband with Billy the lifeguard, but Stranger Things sure dangles that possibility before us. Their would-be tryst does give Billy a reason to be speeding around late at night when he first encounters the Mind Flayer, but did Hawkins’ resident bad boy really need a reason for that in the first place? The whole thing just felt out of place and didn’t really add much to either character.

The newspaper subplot

Nancy spends most of Stranger Things 3 getting spit on by sexist pigs. Hooray for the golden age of television! We can understand the series wanting to dive into sexist politics in the workplace, much in the vein of something like Working Girl, but boy, oh boy this subplot went downhill—then nowhere. It boiled down to “Nancy Drew” trying to pitch a story, getting laughed at by some gross jerks, then heading out to work on it anyway with the help of Jonathan. Then, the publisher and his star reporter get killed. Sure, it’s by Jonathan and Nancy, but when they’re gone they’re gone. The show made it clear that Nancy was smart and had a lot to offer the paper, so it was forced to turn the publisher and his cronies into complete asshats to justify the obstacles. We never even got to see if she sold her story anywhere else. There are much better and more realistic ways to show sexism in the workplace—maybe the Duffers should’ve hired more women writers, who could’ve helped explain it.


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Source: Kotaku.com

Everything You Need to Remember From Stranger Things 1 and 2

Trying to remember what the hell happened on Stranger Things before the third season returns on July 4? We don’t blame you: It’s tough to recall binge shows in detail. Now, there’s no need to comb through episode recaps or season reviews for the main points. Here’s a post and video guide to all the things you need to know before the return of Stranger Things.

The series starts in 1983 in the town of Hawkins, Indiana. It’s a little town with a very big problem (hint: it has to do with a parallel universe). You’ve got your four main characters: Mike Wheeler (Finn Wolfhard), Lucas Sinclair (Caleb McLaughlin), Dustin Henderson (Gaten Matarazzo), and Will Byers (Noah Schnapp). In season two they’re also joined by Max Mayfield (Sadie Sink), the new girl in school. You’ve also got Mike’s sister Nancy (Natalia Dyer), her friend Barb (Shannon Purser), Will’s older brother Jonathan (Charlie Heaton), and Nancy’s shitty boyfriend-turned-everybody’s favorite haircut Steve Harrington (Joe Keery). Dang, that’s a lot of people.

Then, of course, there’s Eleven (Millie Bobby Brown), arguably the most important character on the show. We’ll get to her in a minute.

Will spends most of the first season…gone. Don’t worry, he’s rescued and comes back just a little different. In the first episode of the series, Will is attacked by a mysterious creature, which the boys name the Demogorgon after the Dungeons & Dragons creature. He ends up in a parallel world called the Upside Down. The Upside Down is dark, gross, and very creepy. Lots of dead bodies. Including, eventually, Barb’s.

Justice for Barb.

In typical ‘80s fashion, everyone thinks Will was kidnapped…or ran off. But the boys know something’s wrong, and his mom, Joyce (Winona Ryder), does too—especially since Will finds a way to communicate through the lights in their house. Dad bod Sheriff Hopper (David Harbour) figures it out too, it just takes him a little longer. All the other parents are totally in the dark.

Things get spooky once the boys meet Eleven (real name: Jane), a young girl who escaped from a secret government facility run by her creepy fake-father figure. Eleven likes Eggo waffles and has awesome mental powers. It’s kind of her thing. She was taken from her birth mother by the government to be part of an experiment called Project MK (named after Project MK-Ultra), which was using kids like Eleven to contact the Upside Down and do all sorts of weird stuff. It was because of this government project that the veil between our world and the Upside Down tore open—letting the Demogorgon, and all sorts of other creatures, loose.

What can Eleven do? I think the easier question is what can’t she do. She shows signs of extreme preternatural abilities, and the limits of her powers haven’t begun to be explored yet. We even saw her go on a side quest into the city to gain more information about her powers. Here’s a handy list of some powers she’s demonstrated so far:

  • Telekinesis: the ability to move, change, or reform inanimate objects. For example, she levitates a van and a Millennium Falcon model. Also shows signs of biokinesis, in her ability to hurt or kill other people and creatures using her mind.
  • Levitation: the ability to float above the ground, which she does while closing the Gate at the end of season two.
  • Extrasensory Perception (ESP): the ability to gain knowledge or information through the mind, which she uses to find Will in the Upside Down and communicate with him. Examples of this include telepathy, remote viewing, and “token object reading,” like when she was able to identify Will’s D&D figure before having met him.
  • Portal Creation and Manipulation: the ability to open a portal into the Upside Down and travel into it, this is what causes the veil between the two worlds to open.

At the end of the first season, Eleven banished the Demogorgon, seemingly destroying herself in the process. Spoiler: She didn’t. She’s now living with Hopper, and doing side quests with other Project MK kids to expand her powers to fight—both government agents and monsters alike.

How many creatures have we seen so far? Of course, there’s the Demogorgon, as well as the baby and teenage versions: Dustin’s tiny slug friend D’Artagnan, or Dart, and Demo-dogs, which ate Joyce’s boyfriend Bob (Sean Astin).

Justice for Bob.

There’s also the vines, which spread throughout a bunch of tunnels in Hawkins, and seem to have a mind of their own. Or do they? Because finally, there’s the Mind Flayer. The big boss.

When Will was rescued at the end of season one, he came back with a souvenir. He was possessed by the Mind Flayer, a powerful creature that infected his body like a virus. Hurting the vines and tunnels would, in turn, hurt him. It was up to Will’s family, friends, and the now-likable Steve to get the virus out, and close the gate to the Upside Down, to stop the Mind Flayer from crossing over into our world. Which they did, thanks to a surprise arrival from the superpowered goth celebrity Eleven.

The second season ended with all the kids at the school dance. Eleven’s been adopted by Hopper and is dating Mike. Lucas and Max share a kiss. Will’s…he’s…he’s doing just fine, you guys. But outside, a threat looms. The Mind Flayer is back, and this time it’s not playing around.

Let’s see: What else did we miss? Oh yeah, Lucas’s sister Erica (Priah Ferguson)! She’s there to kick ass and call people nerds. I’m sure there’s a bunch of other details I’m missing. Like Nancy and Jonathan’s side trip to visit a conspiracy theorist in season two, along with Max’s problems with her abusive older brother, Billy (Dacre Montgomery)—who looks to be playing a huge part in the third season. It kind of shows how it’s hard to remember all the little details from binge shows. They come so fast, you don’t have time to remember the specifics. Just the bigger picture.

Upside Down bad. Squad good. Steve and his haircut, best. 

It would be nice if you could step back and watch shows like this one piece at a time. But then, you risk missing out on the conversation. Hopefully we got you caught up! Stranger Things returns with season three on July 4, where we’ll see what everyone gets up to in a Hawkins summer.


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Source: Kotaku.com

Hellboy’s Blood-Soaked Horns Are Too Dull to Leave Much of an Impression

Hellboy wielding Excalibur.
Image: Lionsgate
io9 ReviewsReviews and critical analyses of fan-favorite movies, TV shows, comics, books, and more.  

In the months leading up to Hellboy’s release, much noise was made about how much comic creator Mike Mignola (who co-wrote the film with Andrew Cosby) didn’t want the movie to be an origin story that retread ground Guillermo del Toro staked out in his Hellboy movies. But that seems to have been almost all but lip service because unfortunately, that’s basically what the new Hellboy is.

Director Neil Marshall’s Hellboy reboot is a textbook example of the kind of film where, as you’re watching it in theaters, you can still pick up on the echoes of what it was or might have been earlier in the production process—perhaps when the studio was still considering who should helm the project, or which actors would be best to bring the characters to life. Sometimes, this can work in a movie’s favor. More often than not, though, it’s a major distraction that draws attention away from the story being told, and makes you begin to look for other cracks in the film’s narrative substance.

The new film opens with its titular demon hero (Stranger Things star David Harbour) well into his career working at the Bureau for Paranormal Research and Defense (B.P.R.D.) with his adoptive father Trevor Bruttenholm (American Gods’ Ian McShane). Along with others, they hunt and detain the kinds of magical creatures who pose threats to humanity’s existence. At this point in his life, Hellboy’s no stranger to taking out his demon brethren with ease for the sake of the world but, despite having the physicality of a hulking, grown man from the bowels of the underworld, he’s still relatively young—an immature teenager by demonic standards—and just as petulant as any other kid who’s forced to work alongside their parents.

The moment Harbour appears onscreen as Hellboy, he definitely sells himself as the character much in the same way Ron Perlman did, both because of his solid take on the character’s personality and the impressive amounts of makeup that went into crafting his devilish appearance. As much as we all enjoyed del Toro’s Hellboy films, you can’t deny that the Hellboy costume department stepped its game up and then some with its approach to creating a demon who looks, feels, and moves like a believable being with minimal CGI help.

Hellboy’s relationship with his human father is a key part of the character’s identity because Bruttenholm is the person responsible for giving Hellboy an initial introduction to humanity. Despite the fact that Hellboy is destined to bring about the apocalypse, Bruttenholm loves his son and wants only the best for his monstrous, misunderstood boy.

But because Hellboy’s a film that abhors the idea of showing us things and would rather have characters explain them in order to move on to the next, blood-soaked, lifeless scene, we don’t actually see much of Bruttenholm and Hellboy’s father/son dynamic. Instead, the film’s much more focused on beating you over the head with a selection of greatest hits moments from the Hellboy comics, hoping that you’ll get so swept up in the blood and gore that you mistakenly think you’re having a good time. There’s scarcely enough time to actually drink in what the movie’s serving up as it hops from scene to scene in a way that feels as if Hellboy’s trying to make sure you can’t get a solid lock on it.

As far as the film’s main drama goes, after a failed attempt at unleashing a magical plague upon the world, the Blood Queen witch Nimue (genre mainstay Milla Jovovich) returns to the world of the living with a vengeance and every intention of finishing her important work of transforming the planet into a new Eden for demonkind. As Nimue, Jovovich is at her very most Jovovich—grinding chewed-up scenery she’s long since spat out beneath the heel of her foot with the ease of someone who’s familiar with being dropped into the midst of spectacular, cinematic train wrecks. At times, Nimue is every bit as boring and silly a villain as Suicide Squad’s Enchantress, but whenever Jovovich actually has to deliver lines directly into the camera, she does her damnedest to make the character as intimidating as humanly possible.

When Nimue encounters Hellboy for the first time, she realizes she’s in the presence of demonic greatness and that together, they’d be able to achieve a kind of power neither of them could have ever imagined. But again, Hellboy never slows down enough for those kinds of revelations to mean much of anything, which is a disappointment given you can tell that the film’s actors are perfectly capable of embodying the roles they’ve been tasked with. It’s just that none of the characters are written in a particularly interesting or compelling way.

Hellboy’s joined in his quest to stop Nimue by Alice (Sasha Lane), an old friend of Big Red’s who was left with empathic powers after being kidnapped by fairies as a child, and Ben Daimio (Daniel Dae Kim), a gruff B.P.R.D. agent with a grudge against anything that isn’t of the human world. Together, the trio’s meant to be a ragtag group of misfits who are better off with one another than they know, and they are, but whatever chemistry Harbour, Lane, and Kim have with one another gets lost in the deafening cacophony of Hellboy’s overall messiness. And it has no bearing on the film’s plot, but Daimio’s role in the story is so exceedingly small that claims of the character originally being whitewashed in order to give him “an English background” are laughable.

While Guillermo del Toro wasn’t at all involved in the production of the movie, you can feel the ghosts of his Hellboy films haunting this one in the most unfortunate of ways. While Lionsgate initially pushed the idea of this Hellboy’s R-rating being a necessary part of its story being equal parts horror and fantasy, the end product isn’t scary as much as it is gross. Because the story doesn’t imagine that demons trying to wipe humanity out as scary enough, the film ladles on excessive amounts of gratuitous bloodshed that, after a while, fail to get your heart rate up. There are only so many times you can be horrified to see someone being torn in two before you get bored and start thinking about what all that fake blood might smell like.

Like two great tastes that somehow don’t go well together, Hellboy’s greatest sin is that it makes you long for the film that it might have been because there’s so much about the movie that works in a vacuum. David Harbour absolutely nails the charming, lunk-ish aspects of Hellboy’s personality, and a handful of the film’s action sequences are legitimately fun to watch before you get back to the slog of the rest of the film. Sadly, those few bright spots aren’t likely to convince anyone that this reboot deserves to be a jumping off point for a new series or doing the Hellboy franchise any favors.

Hellboy hits theaters April 12.


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Source: Kotaku.com