Tag Archives: ranked lists

Ranking Every Plant In Plants Vs. Zombies: Battle for Neighborville Based On Tastiness

Plants Vs Zombies: Battle For Neighborville is filled with zombies and plants, as the name suggests. They fight each other for control of the world. Plants wanting to protect humans and zombies wanting to eat humans and their brains. Speaking of eating…

I appreciate everything the plants have done for us humans, protecting us from deadly zombies and various zombie built machines. Very thankful. But I’m also a human and I need to eat and many of these plants are edible. So I decided to rank each plant featured in Battle For Neighborville according to how tasty they are and if they are even edible at all.

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I’m not raking the zombies because they aren’t edible. I mean, I wouldn’t eat a zombie. Would you? (I hope not.)

10 – Oak & Acorn

According to some quick research, acorns are not safe to eat raw. However, you can eat them if you prepare them properly. But I’ve never eaten an acorn. Maybe they taste great? There is one guy who is trying to make acorns popular and someone else has created acorn crackers. They don’t look very tasty.

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The real reason Oak & Acorn are at number 10 on this list is because of the big oak tree. Players can switch between either during gameplay. Oak looks cool and is use useful in combat, but I wouldn’t eat him. I doubt bark tastes very good. You could burn him and cook something on the flame, but beyond that, I don’t think the oak tree belongs in cooking.

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9 – Chomper

Chomper is a fast-moving plant that can burrow underground and attack zombies from below like a shark. Chompers seems inspired by a Venus Fly Trap. So can you eat a Venus Fly Trap? Probably. Should you? No. You shouldn’t. For one thing, they are endangered and might go extinct in the future. For another thing, according to someone on Quora, if you eat one it will grow inside you. Is that person just joking? Maybe…but do you want to risk it?

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8 – Snapdragons

Snapdragons are a real plant, though they don’t have dragon heads attached to them like in the game. They also don’t breathe fire. Honestly, it seems like PVZ developers PopCap needs to do more research. As for edibility, Snapdragons are edible flowers. But according to the internet, they aren’t very tasty compared to other edible flowers. But they also won’t poison you, so that’s a point in its favor.

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7 – Rose

I had to ask for some help making this list. As has been documented on this very site, I’m not the healthiest eater in the world. So I consulted my girlfriend and her experience eating stuff like roses! I didn’t know people eat roses, but she has had roses in tea and liked the taste. I like tea, maybe I’ll add some rosebuds to it next time.

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6 – Sunflower

In PVZ:BFN, Sunflowers are healers that provide plants with bits of the sun to help them stay alive during combat. Sunflower seeds are tasty and definitely edible, but I was surprised to learn that sunflowers are completely edible. Not just the seeds. Every part of a sunflower can be eaten and according to the internet, they taste nice as well.

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5 – Cactus

The cactus is one of my favorite plants to play as in PVZ:BFN. They are a fast-moving sniper with a very useful onion drone. (This is a weird game.) But in real life, I didn’t love the taste of cactus. But I didn’t hate it either. Furthermore, cactus seems really healthy and can potentially lower your cholesterol. Thanks, cactus! Not only are you a powerful sniper who protects humans, but when you die and get eaten by those humans, you help them fight cholesterol. What a hero!

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4 – Night Cap

Night Cap might be one of the coolest plants in the new PVZ game. I never expected a mushroom to translate so perfectly into a fast-moving and stealthy ninja, but there you go. Loads of people eat mushrooms and depending on how they are cooked, I can enjoy some mushrooms too. However, I have no idea what kind of mushroom Night Cap is and so they might not be safe to eat. Considering in the game Night Cap can throw mysterious bubbles made out strange spores, I might skip eating it.

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3 – Peashooter

Peas are totally fine. Maybe this is controversial to say, but I don’t think peas are great. I’ll eat them, sure, but I’m not excited about peas. In a soup or part of a big meal, I’ll chow down on some peas. But alone, I’ll probably pass on peas. The Peashooter itself is technically edible, but according to my research would probably be too tough and stringy to enjoy.

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2 – Citron

I grew up in Florida and developed a taste for Oranges back when I was very young. Orange juice is wonderful and one of my favorite drinks to have in the morning. So it should come as no surprise that Citron, a giant orange, makes it so high up on my list of edible PVZ plants. Oranges are super tasty and also can provide extra flavor to different deserts and meals. None of my oranges ever shoot lasers, but maybe I’m just not buying the right oranges.

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1 – Kernel Corn

Corn is good. Not a controversial opinion, I know. But corn is easily my favorite food on this list. It can be popped, creamed, cooked on a cob, frozen, made into bread or puffed. Plus Kernel Corn in the game is a great attacker who I use a lot. And let’s be honest, that name is great and worth some bonus points.

Source: Kotaku.com

PC Game Launchers, Ranked

On April Fool’s Day, Corsair joked about a game launcher launcher that would launch your PC game launchers. My colleague Mike Fahey and I halfway wished that it were real, and our conversation got me thinking about how many game launchers I have. Here are a whole lot of PC game launchers, ranked from best to worst, as well as a ranking of their desktop icons out of five.

Steam

I don’t know if Steam is actually the best or if I just have Stockholm syndrome, but look: all my games are here. I never forget what the screenshot key is when I’m on a different computer, and I can upload those screenshots to the cloud and have them whenever I need them.

The launcher does have its downsides. The pop-ups when you start it are annoying as hell, sometimes the downloads hang, and creating a group chat is needlessly confusing. But Steam has the nostalgia factor: it’s where I bought my first “real” PC game, and it’s probably where I’ll buy my last.

Icon: 2. It’s apparently a part of a steam engine, which would only be obvious if you’re a travelling salesman from the 1800s. I’ve spent ten years thinking it was a link from a bike chain.

Battlenet

Battlenet’s chat function is pretty OK. Sometimes I find my Facebook friends streaming Overwatch from the in-game stream function, which inspires me to open up Battlenet so I can play with them, only to end up watching Overwatch League instead. Intentionally or not, this launcher has encouraged me to spend a lot of time thinking about Overwatch without having to actually play it. That means I avoid making my teammates mad at me when I don’t heal them quickly enough. I guess it might not be a game launcher so much as an esports launcher, but it’s still number two on my list.

Icon: 3. No clue what it is, but I can always tell it apart from the other stuff in my taskbar.

Epic

The lack of a playtime counter is annoying, and I hate that I have to use an outside program for screenshots and then I can never remember where they’re saved. But, as far as launchers go, it’s fine. I like the highly visible progress bar when a game is updating, so I can keep an eye on my update from across the room. I mostly use it for Fortnite, but every so often, I remember I have other games in my library and am pleasantly surprised to see them there. It’s like a mini Christmas.

Icon: 3. Straightforward, but boring.

GOG

Every time I open GOG, I remember that I could be playing The Witcher 3. I appreciate a launcher that has my best interests in mind.

Icon: 3. See above.

Itchio

The only launcher that makes me feel like a good person, since it reminds me I’m supporting all those indie games. The desktop client allows me to revisit all the tiny games I bought and then immediately lost in my files.

Icon: 4. It looks like a controller, which might be weird for a computer icon, but there’s something whimsical about its design.

Uplay

This opens whenever I open a Ubisoft game on Steam, which does give me some time after I hit “play” to grab a drink. Also, sometimes Uplay gives me points. I’ve never done anything with them, but who doesn’t like getting points?

Icon: 4. I like the color on this one and its design, even if I can’t tell whether it’s a flower or a whirlpool. Ubisoft calls it a “swirl,” so maybe it’s ice cream? Ice cream is nice.

Origin

I kind of like the way my game pages slide in from the side when I select them, but other than that, I hate this launcher’s guts. I can never figure out how to answer a voice or text message in a timely fashion, and it probably makes all my friends think I’m a jerk. I recently bought Titanfall 2 through its store, and there were so many messages about getting Origin Premier or whatever that I almost gave up before I bought the game. (The game was good, though, so Origin has that in its favor.)

Icon: 5. God help me, but it doesn’t look like anything else I have installed, and the bright color makes it easy to find.

Bethesda Launcher

This could have Skyrim on it, which is good if you need a special place just for Skyrim.

Icon: 1. Completely missable and a little bit ugly.

All those other random launchers, like Nexon or single-game launchers, that pop up whenever I turn on the office PC and I have no idea why.

Somebody wanted them, which I can at least respect.

Icon: 1. There are too many to evaluate, but they get a point for existing.

Windows Store

Never again.

Icon: 0. If it’s on my desktop somewhere, I don’t want to know.

Source: Kotaku.com